Reconnecting & Recharging in Cost Rica
I recently, like 6 days ago, got home from Nourish Your Soul Yoga retreat in Nosara, Costa Rica. This was my 2nd time at this retreat. I know how lucky I am to have these opportunities to Nourish and Reconnect. This time around, I was really looking forward to some vinyasa yoga, some bonding with friends, some yummy vegan food and some sun. And I got all of those things, but to my awakened amazement, I got so much more. Clique right? But I mean it. Let me explain…
This year has been so amazing for me in so many ways, and one of those massive ways has been the success of my YbK business. I love this portion of my life, I believe in what I teach, I feel comfort from the people that reach out and I feel a true sense of community-especially since we moved our outdoor practice to a permeant structure!
But it’s also been my most challenging. I’m a busybody at the best of times, and find that I have a hard time just sitting and chilling….so the busy part of this is full filling for me…the challenging part is allowing my mind to shut off and just be in the moment.
So my goal with this retreat was to FULLY NOURISH my soul, try to figure out how to balance my jobs with my home life, discover what makes me relax and fully emerge myself in my yoga practice-which I’ve so been missing lately.
What I wasn’t planning on was how tired I was. I had be fighting a headache for about 3 days when I arrive at the Costa Rica Yoga Spa and I felt drained.
I felt good in this photo, but looking at it now, I can see the exhaustion I felt. And I know now that I put a lot of that on myself.
It didn’t take long for my sweet fellow retreaters to kick into care mode. I had head massages, hand/pressure point massages, ice packs and such sweet words said to me. And the headache lifted…after a couple of days. I stayed back from going into town, just sitting quietly by the pool by myself, journaling, meditating and sleeping. I did this for 4 days. And after the 4th day I felt I was emerging .
I did one of my own meditations on how to find a mantra, and the word grateful came to me. I had been struggling, as you guys know, with a work/life balance. Do I shift from nursing to yoga, do I scale back on the yoga, WTF DO I DO?!
All of a sudden it became very clear to me….stop trying to control everything, be grateful that I have 2 amazing jobs that I do love and that one of them allows me to work a lot from home. Relish in that fact! Be grateful that my nursing career is the perfect yang to the yin of my yoga career. Acknowledge that I have a stable, loving, amazing family that is always there for me and supporting me along this journey. Be grateful for the amazing people I work with at the hospital, acknowledge the tremendous support they offer me and the guidance and love they show me.
I realized I was exhausting myself needlessly. That’s not to say that I haven’t been working my butt off these last few months, because I have, but I’ve also been spiralling in all that work, allowing it to take up every space in my brain so that it was all I was thinking about.
Once I discovered this, everything began to fit together. From what my ideal nursing schedule would look like, to how I would schedule in yoga time, to how my down time should look. I realized how everything going on in my life right now is a positive, truly a positive. My kids are healthy, my husband is happy, my careers are successful and I am on a freaking yoga retreat.
Once the fog cleared, the calm rejuvenation began.
And so I returned to my amazing life. Headache free, plan “free,” renewed and feeling balanced. Which was exactly what I set out to accomplish. And while I took a completely different path than I had planned out, that in itself taught me so much!
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…..we have all the tools, guys. And it’s hard to see sometimes that what we feel messy about can be of our own doing. Sitting down and listening to your quiet, honest inner voice is where it’s at. It’s where we find the answers we seek and the calmness we yearn for. And while it sometimes takes flying to a rain forest to sit with your thoughts to figure that out, it’s there. Just waiting, sometimes not so patiently for us to listen to….
PS-I did find myself a little more this trip, and in doing so I’ve come to realize that airplanes and me bring drama. They really always have. Sometimes the drama is me, sometimes it’s a young woman standing up screaming while her friends chant to her…..you know….balance.